5 lies Singapore told me

DISCLAIMER: This post is in no way intended to defame nor malign Singapore. The cosmopolitan city-state has been my host country since 2012, and I will always remain grateful for its open policy to welcome migrant workers into multicultural workplaces.

I am even more thankful to Singapore for treating me and my family like one of its own, even if we do not have birthright to claims to full pledge citizenship in this first world Asian country. No words can say it all, but I wish to commend its highly effective governance and cordial people for the many wonderful opportunities vested upon foreign workers like myself.

For many others who romanticize working overseas, here's a grounded reality check that it's not all green pastures nor a bed of roses. Here are 5 openly accepted, socially embedded lies we may collectively rethink when living in a highly industrialized urban jungle that is Singapore.

1.) Working long hours is the way to make a living. The work environment leans on very Asian values, and Singaporeans work long and hard. Most Singapore households are dual-income, and both husband and wife burn their daytime at work to meet certain lifestyle standards.

Even if salaries are valued at nearly 5x the compensation rate against those in my home country, one has to trade time - and lots of it - to get compensated. A typical employee spends some good 12 hours at work (inclusive of a normal 2-hour commute to and fro).

On a personal level though, I am thankful to be in the education industry with bosses who understand the need for work-life integration. I am given the liberty to work from home if needed, and leave the workplace on time to attend to family matters.

Still, many others in this city-state do not enjoy the same. Singapore's workaholic culture drives daytime workers to spend nights and weekends beating deadlines to meet the delivery quota. And this has been proven unhealthy to many life aspects including health and family.

Many parents with infants and toddlers are conditioned to leave their children to childcare centres, which provide a staged environment for child development. This drives the youngsters to be independent even at age 1.5 with only a handful of help from early childhood teachers available everyday (from 7am to 7pm).

The perpetual need for financial liberation is highly prohibitive of one's inner prodding to enjoy life outside the employment mould, unless one belongs to the billionaires' league. While it's all systems go for a state that promotes continuous development and economic proficieny, there are hidden costs that remain untold in Singapore's very 'Instagram' life.

2.) Prudence is always necessary. There is no room for wasteful spending. As a natural consequence of #1, Singapore's highly effective means to drive up the economy provides hardly any space for mistakes. One has to justify spending resources (whether time, money, or energy) on a personal or congregational level. In fact, one local commented that Singapore's 'economic effectiveness' is already borderline sick, to the point of scarring emotions and relationships.

To demonstrate this more concretely, such need for perfection is inevitably transferred to young minds. I heard stories of children as young as Primary 1 beating and hurting themselves due to imperfect exam scores or unnecessary comparison with peers. Local children have embraced pressure by age 7, and they need to either pass all nationally accredited exams or risk 'social acceptance.'

Everything comes with a price, and this institutionalised faithfulness to efficiency has many times robbed Singapore of creativity, productive failures, and experiential mistakes. And I'm afraid that Singapore is (un)consciously raising a perfectionist generation with little to zero tolerance for failure.

3.) Monetary spending is as essential as working. Singapore companies are bullish marketers, and each wage earner needs to join the trade of goods and services.

The 800-m stretch from Ion Orchard to Somerset is one of the island's most celebrated shopping districts. It houses a grand parade of life-sized ads each crying for attention, and thus creates the 'need' to justify spending even beyond modesty levels.

To make things worse, mandatory savings is never an auto-part of the financial equation for foreign workers like myself. We do not form part of the Central Provident Fund (CPF), which forces locals and permanent residents (PRs) to set aside a fraction of their salaries for long-term savings. Non-locals/PRs need to self-impose strict financial control to make the most out of their income.

4.) One needs to stay connected, 24/7. Singapore prides itself for its strong connectivity online, and nearly all public areas are powered with wi-fi. A normal MRT sighting during transit is a mass of heads either plugged with earphones or glued to small screens. The level of connectivity is already beyond hyper.

One certainly needs to be intentional when using phone and laptop screens at home and at work - the two most frequented places in Singapore life where you can either 'make it' or 'break it' depending on the soundness of your Internet use. One has to self-police and impose accountability for personal or official use of e-devices. Otherwise, Internet use guised as 'connectivity' can easily eat your thoughts and precious time.

5.) There are stereotypes, life templates you need to abide by. Singapore has made a 'routing' system for children to determine their employment pathway later in life. The system goes without saying that one cannot be equally good in field A and field B at the same time. One has to choose a specific field to fit a culture where 'like minds think alike.' But that same culture may ostracize those still searching or with no definite mould.

These 'lies' turned 'social truths' brought a self-consciousness to challenge anything before acceptance. And yes, all are free anyway to break the mould and create his or her own.